Communicating Through Dementia, strategies for communicating with your loved one

Talking to someone with a memory impairment can be a challenge. Discover some of the strategies that can help you communicate with your loved one more effectively.

Dementia affects how our brain works and that means that it changes how people express themselves and how they understand what is being communicated to them. A common example is that dementia affects a person’s ability to remember dates, names and places, or they may struggle to find words and complete sentences. As well as difficulty recalling words, dementia can also affect our physical ability to speak. This can make communicating with someone with dementia all the more challenging. 

When caring for your loved one, you might need to develop new skills to help facilitate communication and have effective conversations to enable them to continue expressing their wishes. It is important to remember that the person living with this condition may feel confusion or anxiety and are experiencing daily life in a completely new way. 

Strategies for Communicating with Someone with Dementia 

Consider your environment 

• Reduce distractions. It is important that both people participating in the discussion give their full attention. A noisy TV in the background may make the conversation more challenging. Reducing the amount of unnecessary noise may also bring stress levels down. 
• Make sure other needs are addressed. As people with dementia can have difficulty communicating, sometimes their anxiety or defensiveness can be caused by something else. Make sure they are not in pain or hungry. 
• Keep eye contact. Maintaining eye contact can help focus the conversation and keep the person receiving care engaged. Have the conversation at their level, if they’re sitting then sit down with them. 
• Think about the time of day. There may be times when your loved one is more alert and able to answer questions. Save your important conversations for these moments. 

Practice being a good listener 

• Stay calm and be patient. Your loved one’s communication and processing skills have been hindered by their dementia. They need more time to express themselves than we do.  
• Don’t rush. Don’t try to race through a conversation to get an answer. Plan ahead and make sure you have enough time for the discussion. Give extra time between sentences for your loved ones to process the information. If your loved one senses you are inpatient or agitated, they may clam up. 
• Avoid confrontation. Someone with dementia is in a confused state and may be having difficulty expressing themselves. Showing signs of frustration may only cause them to shut down. If your loved one is upset, give them time to express their feelings. 
• Give gentle encouragement. Show enthusiasm when listening to your loved one, without pressuring them too much. Use nodding and verbal cues to indicate that you are listening and paying attention. 
• Make sure you capture the meaning. If you are not sure what your loved one said then you can ask them to repeat it. Or, repeat back what you understood and ask them to confirm. 
• Use descriptions. If your loved one is having difficulty remembering a word for something you can ask them to describe it instead. Try to let your loved one recall the words or finish their sentence on their own. 

Be clear and concise 

• Use short and direct sentences. Overall, try to keep the conversation as short as possible, communicating only one idea at a time. 
• Reframe the question. Change how you invite your loved one to join in on daily tasks. Instead of asking if they’d like to go for a walk, ask them for your help with a small errand (like walking to the mailbox). 
• Ask questions that require simple answers. Keeping the conversation simple and narrow will allow the other person to express themselves accurately. 
• Get creative. Using prompts like a photo or object can help facilitate a conversation. 

Pick up on non-verbal cues 

• A person’s body language can tell you a lot about how they feel. People with dementia often experience anxiety which can manifest in physical signs. 
• Someone with dementia may have difficulty expressing themselves verbally. Non-verbal cues could be the only way for them to demonstrate their feelings. 

Communicating with your loved one living with dementia requires patience, empathy, and a compassionate approach. By creating a calm environment, keeping your words concise, and incorporating new methods of delivery, you can enhance communication and improve the daily life of your loved one. Remember to listen actively, validate their feelings, and adapt to their changing abilities. Creating effective communication can improve not only their quality of life, but that of their caregivers. 

Talking with a loved one who has dementia can be a challenge. Watch this short helpful video on what strategies you can use to communicate with your loved one.